Thursday, April 17, 2014

Resurrection



It's been a while, hasn't it?

Well, life and laziness happened, so I'll do away with the excuses and niceties and jump right back where we left off, cool?

The hubby and I moved to Athens in January this year and I tearfully left behind my beloved Istanbul and tore my body (never my heart, never) away from all the precious, most beautiful friends I made in those short two years.

It was rough. And still is. All the expat ladies know what I'm talking about. Life in a new country is toughest in the first six months. Okay, let's be real and say a year. It's a time when you're all alone in a city whilst your husband is busy working his ass off to prove his worth to his new company. I don't speak for those with kids, of course. I speak for the just-a-wifes'. The house is silent with only your thoughts to accompany you. You try to not sink into a state of 'i'm such a poor thing' because you know you're really lucky. You go out and try to maneuver the city but sometimes the groups of people laughing and talking to each other makes your heart hurt so bad because you think of all those that you miss and love. You reply 'Life's GREAT!' to people who message you because you know that's what they want to hear or you don't even bother to reply because there are some days when it takes too much energy to lie. And the incessant questions of 'have you made any friends yet' make you just want to write a self-righteous spiel on the difference between acquaintances and friends and how you prefer the wonderful company of yourself, and are not desperate enough to randomly 'make friends' just to be with someone. Then you feel bad because you know they mean well.

This is not a rant nor am I feeling sorry for myself. 

It's just a rite of passage we who choose our lives must go through. 

Because the rewards are enormous. And anyone who's asked me THE question, even in my deepest moments of loneliness, I'd tell without hesitation that I would never have it any other way.

Because once those dark clouds pass, and as long as you work on yourself to be grateful for every single little thing that makes you happy, the rainbow and sunshine comes. And when it comes, the scene is spectacular.

We've moved from Shanghai to Luxembourg to Istanbul to Athens. I know not what Athens will bring, but if there's one thing that my memories and this blog will show, is that every single move brought me more joy than I could ever imagine, by far surpassing the anguish of every single farewell. 

I've met the most incredible people who feature so prominently in my life that I cannot imagine how life was before them. I know the little alleyways of streets of cities that so many skim through. I've played host to loved ones who come to visit, and know that I made their holiday that much more awesome. I've taken up new hobbies. Had all the time in the world to smell the roses and get to know and love myself a little better. And almost every single day, I do something for the first time. Because even shopping for groceries can become an adventure.  Trying exotic food an everyday occurrence. Every hello rife with possibility.

After all, isn't it true that you appreciate the sun more when it's been cold for too long? And that reunions are sweeter because of goodbyes. And that life's so precious because there is death.

I have so many stories to tell. So many.

Which is why I'm writing again.

Welcome back to my life, peeps. :)